quit???

it has been so long...i miss u..and i really really miss u ...but i dont have the time..as usual it was a lame excuse to abandon u...just like that...i wish i can be like last time..was so free..was so cheerful....

i was thinking to leave u..contemplating with the though so many times..yes or no..but couldnt decided...tak sampai hati....but i even couldnt take care of myself let alone to handle u...so miserable...

what am i suppose to do now...please help me...who wants to help me..i dont know..i wish i can be more assertive...more confident...yet i was so confuse..

this is my journey..my diary...should i continue or should i stop...give me some time..take it or leave it...the final decision is all mine...

hellloooo ...!!

1. hello everybody...actually i feel much much better today..thanks for the prayers my friend....
2. so sorry for not telling u that i was having quite a major operation 2 weeks ago to remove one of my internal organ that i wish not to tell what...hehehe
3. i'm on my 6 weeks medical leaves but i couldnt post anything interesting rite now...
4. did anybody tell u that drinking a snakehead fish tonic sucks?? yewww...but i have to drink that everyday.. a dozen bottles already infact...but it helps a lot!
5. i do visit your site from time to time eventhough i didnt leave any comment...not yet..let me recover first..kayy!
6. i lost weight!! i dont intend to because i always hoping to gain weight...sad!
7. i went through hell past few months but i accept that as dugaan from god..):
7. tell u what...cant wait to recover and do havoc again..till then..daaaaa...!

pray 4 me....

1. i was sick
2. been warded in hospital for 6 days.
3. very low hameoglobin counts - had 2 pts of blood transfussion.
4. couldnt updating my blog for now - will update it later - when i'm a lil' bit ok
5. just pray for my recovery
6. thank u

The Year of 2009

today is the 1st january 2009...everybody knows that ...i dont want to sound like a broken record and say that this year i want to do this and i want to do that...that is called a new year resolutions babe..but to look back i did achieve some of it..and i dont have any regret even if i didnt achieve anything...

for a start, i managed to be a runner up for the Blog Idol competition (sadly, i didnt win the first place but still grateful) organized by bluedreamer.... but at the same blog.. i've been interviewed by him as 'The Interesting Blog of The Month December'. U can read the post here. And this is the award that i received from him...thanks dude..


and today (very very excited) i will bring back a new car for me to drive...i can tell u that this will be a new year present for myself..what car? errr that i will blog about it later...a very good start...

yersterday morning i went to school for a meeting and the principle has given us a warning not to wear a pants (for ladies) even if we still consider ourself in a holiday because the school only will be opened on 5th january and i was one of the teacher who was wearing a pants...isk isk isk...not a good start....

then yesterday afternoon i went for my masters classes for the first time..i drove all the way from Seremban to Serdang...just after i reached the toll plaza my friend called and told me that the lecturer was still on leave till the 5th January...not a good start...

during the school meeting also i've been told that one of the counsellor is going to further her study in one of the collage and she will be taking one year off...that means more work to be distributed among us.....not a good start...

on the way home i saw a catfish...yes u read it right..a catfish wriggling on the road (i dont know how on earth it ended up on there)...i stopped my car..scooped up the fish and threw it in the small river nearby..i guess he was lucky!! it was a good start for the fish...atleast he was not end up in the cooking pot somewhere!

well..well..well.. eventhough in the beginning things doesnt sound so good (except for the catfish) i still insisted to be very very optimistic that everything will turn out ok at the end...pray with me buddy!

A Cow story....

this is me...not related to the story i'm going to tell...ahaks.


euwwwww!!! this blog full of dust already....!!must do some clean up...ohhhh so lazy....school holidays near to end but i dont get to go anywhere..with floods and landslide everywhere i think i better snuggle up in my bed and just sleep through...atleast i wake up feel fresh! and i dont have to fork out money...with the current financial crisis and economic breakdown i think i should safe more money...yeah i feel quite guilty about my last shopping spree but that will be only for this year...2009 will be new year and new resolution...nahhhh dont believe that crap!

last eidul adha i went back to kampung...my beloved sister wanted to sacrifice a
cow for her family...i dont participate in the event because like normal people..i cant stand to see the blood splurting around eventhough some people seems to enjoy the moment...!but that is their choice rite..?

talking about 'korban' i remember one special incident happened to me few years ago...that time i just got my teaching job...so my mom persuaded me to buy a female
calf for some kind of investmnt...hehehe...she said in no time the cow will multiply..and i dont even have to lift a finger...somebody will take care of it for me...true enough after my baby got herself pregnat..but dont ask me who the father is! when the time was due..she got a problem in the delivery process...the baby's leg sticking out first so it got entagled (am i using the right word?)

we called the veterinar and god knows how he tried to save the mom-to-be and the baby but failed. i remembered somebody told my mom that they had to slaughter the cow..if not she would suffer a great deal...! listen to this advice,both of us..me and my mom cried our heart out...!ohhhh..i dont want to think and talk about ths anymore...i was really stressed that time and no matter what i'm not going rear any cow or goat again....!but i do think sometimes..if she survived that time i might be a rich woman by now...i may have 10 or 20 cows and if one cow cost about RM1800..ha u kira sendiri berapa! but for now...abuk pun takdak! i just buy the meat in supermarket and think about my cow...hehehe.

btw i manage to enter the final round of blog's idol contest at bluedreamer's place..and i need your help to vote for me atleast...i only get 2 votes so far compared to 8 votes by the other participants...ok thanks to u in advance! my choice of song is "SEE U AGAIN" by Miley Cyrus...arigato!